Waiting on HIM

I heard GOD speak to me about my future while I was in Bali. However, at times I begin to doubt HIM. Maybe I only heard what I wanted too. Maybe I am wrong about the person, once again.

I know that I have spoken out to those I am close to about what I KNOW, yet......I have been waiting my whole life to have a relationship. To be in a committed, serious relationship that is a reflection of GOD's love. I have longed for a partner to share this journey with. Someone whom will help me draw closer to the LORD, making me a better person. Someone to travel with and share in serving GOD with. I do KNOW what I heard GOD say.

And it all started a year ago, when I was not looking for anyone. When I was preparing to move to another country and serve GOD. Though this was also a dream that I had wanted to share with a partner.

I was content a year ago, and that after a year of hoping and waiting for someone else that I thought GOD put into my life and was the one (This is a story in itself and actually was something spoken in my life in August 1997, a prophetic word). I didn't want the hurt again and finally was content with just being with GOD. And that is when GOD brought the most amazing man into my life.

He and I have stayed in touch over the last year while I was away and I thought by now that we would have reconnected. And it just doesn't seem to be happening yet. And well, I'm doubting. Hey, look at my history.......why would this man be any different than the guys I have met in the past, who all just seem to disappear.

The key to that difference is that I HEARD GOD SPEAK!!!! I KNOW exactly what HE said. As I was getting down and doubting and listening to the whispers this week, GOD has spoken loud and clear again. HE is reminding me to trust HIM and wait for the thing HE spoke and I know to be true.

First, it was on Saturday when Allyson felt that I needed to read this devotional that she got in an email. She hadn't read it yet, but knew it was meant for me to see. Here is that devotional:

When the Lord Tarries
by Os Hillman, July 28, 2007

For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay. - Habakkuk 2:3

God has a storehouse of blessings that He has reserved for you and me. However, our timing to receive those blessings may not be the same as our Lord's. God has a specific timetable that He requires to accomplish His purposes in the life of the believer. Sometimes that timetable seems excruciatingly cruel and painful, yet it is needful.

When we read that Joseph remained a slave in Egypt and was then placed in prison after being wrongfully accused, it would be easy to second-guess the God of the universe. Oh, how cruel and uncaring, we might think. Joseph thought he was going to be delivered from prison when he interpreted a dream for a court official, but then he was forgotten another two years. Why? An early release would have disrupted God's perfect plan.

God takes time to develop character before anything else. God could not afford to have a prideful 30-year-old managing the resources of an entire region of the world.

We can sometimes delay this timetable if we refuse His correction.

Although it is sometimes difficult to understand, the Lord is just and gracious in His dealings with His children. When He does decide to move on our behalf, we will appreciate the delay and will often understand the reason it was needed. Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him! (Is. 30:18)

If you are awaiting the fulfillment of a vision in your life, ask the Lord for His grace to sustain you. It will be worth the wait.

And when I got up on Sunday, I opened up "Our Daily Bread" to read and the scripture used was Habakkuk 1:12-2:3. I went to find Allyson and ask her if she thought GOD had a message for me this weekend? HE could not have spoken any louder. Here is what that said:

God’s Delays
by David H. Roper, July 29, 2007

READ: Habakkuk 1:12–2:3

I will stand my watch and set myself on the rampart, and watch to see what He will say to me. —Habakkuk 2:1

Waiting is hard for me. I want answers now. Postponements perplex me; deferrals daunt me. I’m baffled by God’s delays, wondering why and when. “How long, O Lord?”

The prophet Habakkuk wanted answers as well, but God chose to take His time. “I will stand my watch . . . to see what [God] will say to me,” Habakkuk wrote (2:1). “The vision is yet for an appointed time,” God replied. “Wait for it; because it will surely come” (v.3).

Faith never gives up. It knows that despite appearances, all is well. It can wait without signs or significant indications that God is at work, because it is sure of Him. “Each delay is perfectly fine, for we are within the safe hands of God,” said Madame Guyon (1648–1717).

We too must learn to view each delay as if it were “perfectly fine.” Postponements are reasons to pray rather than grow anxious, impatient, and annoyed. They’re opportunities for God to build those imperishable but hard-to-acquire qualities of humility, patience, serenity, and strength. God never says, “Wait awhile,” unless He is planning to do something in our situation—or in us. He waits to be gracious.

So take heart! If God’s answer tarries, “Wait for it; because it will surely come.”

Soon shall the morning gild

The dark horizon rim,

Thy heart’s desire shall be fulfilled—

“Wait patiently for Him.” —Havergal

God stretches our patience to enlarge our soul.

Tell me GOD wasn't speaking to me this weekend. HE was pretty loud and clear. Habakkuk 2:3 says exactly what I needed to hear. So again, I am reminded to Wait on and Trust in HIM.

Habakkuk 2:3 spoke so loudly to me this weekend that I went to Bible Gateway to look up different translations. Here is some of what I found:

Contemporary English Version
At the time I have decided, my words will come true. You can trust what I say about the future. It may take a long time, but keep on waiting-- it will happen!
New International Version
For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.
The Message
This vision-message is a witness pointing to what's coming.
It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait! And it doesn't lie.If it seems slow in coming, wait. It's on its way. It will come right on time.
New King James Version
For the vision is yet for an appointed time; But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; Because it will surely come, It will not tarry.
New Living Translation
This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled.If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.
New Century Version
It is not yet time for the message to come true, but that time is coming soon; the message will come true. It may seem like a long time, but be patient and wait for it, because it will surely come; it will not be delayed.
New American Standard Bible
For the vision is yet for the appointed time; It hastens toward the goal and it will not fail Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay.
New Life Version
For it is not yet time for it to come true. The time is coming in a hurry, and it will come true. If you think it is slow in coming, wait for it. For it will happen for sure, and it will not wait.
New International Reader's Version
The message I give you waits for the time I have appointed. It speaks about what is going to happen. And all of it will come true. It might take a while. But wait for it. You can be sure it will come. It will happen when I want it to.

PRAISE JESUS!! For HIS perfect timing in speaking to my heart and in EVERYTHING.

I got it....

Yep, it came to me like a lighting bolt and I got it today. I understand what I was feeling yesterday and why it was such a rough day. It was funny to get some of your responses to what you thought may be going on with me knowing things from my past. It was just a reminder that I have really changed and that GOD is very much the center of my life and my guide. So thank you for the smile and the reminder of how GOD does change us from the inside.

I know that I was feeling alone yesterday because as I reflect on the life I had here in Colorado before I left for Korea I recall that I worked two jobs and was always on the go. If I wasn't working, I was out doing something with a family or friends, or even on a date. Then I had about 10 months where I had lots of time alone with GOD, which at that stage of my journey is exactly what I needed.

I guess in returning home, I thought things would be like they were before I left. But, they are not. Life has gone on, you all have changed and yet, so have I.

I realized that when I first got back to the States I was busy every day watching four awesome kids that I live with right now. Plus, I was recovering from jet lag and, well, ten months of whatever it was. Then I went home to Michigan for about two weeks where I was continually on the go visiting friends and family. Plus, my first week back to Colorado after that trip was filled every minute. Then this past weekend that had been planned with Allyson since probably February finally came to be and was awesome.

Yet, yesterday arrived and well, I don't have a car yet and I have a week with absolutely nothing planned. No where to go, nothing to do, and truthfully not much to look forward to. Me, who has always been on the go and loves to be busy (yet I do like my quiet time), is ready to "FLY", so to speak. I want to go hiking and camping. I want to see a movie and watch a baseball game (just to get ready for Football season of course). I want to go out on a date, spent time with friends talking and hanging out...................,but it all hit me yesterday............I know life won't be the same as before I left, but I just can't sit still when there is soooo much living out there to do. When there are so many opportunities to seize. I don't want to start all over and find new things to do and new people to do them with.............but I guess I may just have to.

I forced myself to go to Bible Study last night and I am glad I did. Scott, I may have to just join you all tomorrow night for sushi too. I loved going to Tanya's Birthday party, as well as small group on Friday. Lori, I look forward to getting together and meeting your precious new bundle of joy soon as well. Adrienne, I also, so look forward to finally meeting such a wonderful authentic, inspirational women of GOD. Raych, it was awesome to have lunch and share with you.........though, we do need to finish where we left off. Kent, thanks for lunch today, you always make me smile. David, I look forward to seeing you and letting things unfold. I can't even begin to express the thanks I have for the family I live with.......... though, I do know that they know how much they mean to me. I don't know what I would do with out them.

I could go on and on.........I just know there is so much still to do and soooo many of you whom I still need to hug your necks. And well, I can't sit still for too long. I loved my time alone with GOD over the past almost year in Korea, but it is time to Seize different and more moments, and to add to a previous blog, use my wings to Fly.

Living the Message for today says: Poetry is essential....because poetry is original speech. The word is creative: it brings into being what was not there before- perception, relationship, belief. Out of the silent abyss a sound is formed: people hear what was not heard before and are changed by the sound from loneliness into love. Out of the blank abyss a picture is formed by means of metaphor: people see what they did not see before and are changed by the image from anonymity into love. Words create. GOD's word creates; our words can participate in the creation.

I just wanted to share that because it hit my heart as I was having thoughts about writing but wanted to be with GOD before I did write my thoughts about yesterday. The parts about change and participating in creation just really hit me. I want my heart to continuously be changing for the better and towards GOD, and I REALLY want to participate in HIS creation.

And Yes, HE spoke through God Calling as well: Our LORD, guide us. Show us Thy Will and Way in Everything. Keep close to Me and you shall know the Way because, as I said to My disciples, I am the Way. That is the solution to all Earth's problems. Keep close, very close to Me. Think, act, and live in My Presence. How dare any foe touch you, protected by Me! That is the secret of all Power, all Peace, all Purity, all influence, the keeping very near to Me. Abide in Me. Live in My Presence. Rejoice in My Love. Thank and Praise all the time. Wonders are unfolding.

Also, thank you Miss Shirley for sharing this devotion with me today: Text: “Yet this is what the Sovereign Lord says: ‘It will not take place, it will not happen” (Isaiah 7.7)
Thought of the day: To put this verse in context, the Lord made a statement & a promise. He made a statement that He knew the plans of godless people to attack the Jews. There is something soothing in knowing that God is aware of my circumstances. In all my years of praying, I have never informed God of anything. He not only knows about my circumstances, His knowledge of my circumstances is greater than mine. There is also something encouraging knowing that God is maintaining a level of control over my circumstances. The promise in Isaiah 7.7 was that God would not allow the plans of the wicked to succeed. You can rest assured that God is keeping a watchful eye on you & yours. He goes about our day with a quiet confidence that everything is going to be OK. He’s not stressed out. He’s not searching for answers. He knows everything about you & is working on your behalf. Trust Him.

How can I end this other than just raising my hands and yelling, in honor of my class in Korea: "Praise the LORD. Give thanks to the LORD, for HE is good. HIS love endures forever."

PRAISE JESUS!!

Rough Day

Today was my first really rough day since returning to the States. Well, other than feeling tired my first week back due to jet lag. Why do I write about it knowing that we all have rough days is because I have been anticipating it.

I have been very surprised how great I have been doing, but today, I felt more alone than any of the days in Korea. Oh, PRAISE JESUS, that I KNOW I am not, but I still felt so alone today.

Maybe it was coming down from a really big high over the weekend. I had a great time up in Winter Park reading a book with a friend and just enjoying my surroundings. It was a weekend filled with quality time with someone who means so much to me. I am very thankful for that time and opportunity to have experienced with her.

So why this strong feeling today? In feeling alone, which again I know I am not, it caused me to drop my defenses so to speak and allow the enemy to whisper very loudly in my ear. Which I am sure only added to my feelings. And brought doubt to my heart. This hurt I think more than anything because I don't want to doubt GOD, yet at this very moment it is hard to trust in what I know to be true and what I know I know. I hate knowing the truth, yet having to fight my feelings.........it makes me feel like I am doubting GOD and not trusting HIM.

As I felt alone today, I recalled that I read something that goes along with this in Our Daily Bread on Sunday.

Joe Stowell wrote: We all face storms that threatens to confuse and disorient us. It may be a call from the doctor's office, a friend who has betrayed you, or a shattered dream. Those are the times to be especially careful. When you are blinded by life's disappointments, don't trust your instincts. Flying by the seat of your pants in the storms of life can lead to despair, confusion, and vengeful responses that make matters worse. GOD wants to guide you, and HIS Word is packed with wisdom and insights for living. HIS "Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path" (Psalm 119:105). Where HE leads is always right! "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye." (Psalm 32:8)

I don't feel like I am in a storm, but I do need to remember that it is HE who guides me and I know HIS promises. I can't trust in the way I feel today, which is alone, very alone. For I know I am not. HE is with me and HE has placed me presently where I know that I am loved.

Maybe these feelings are some underlying ones that I haven't dealt with yet from Korea, things that the enemy knows can get to my heart and blind me from the truth, so he whispers what cuts in deep........... although I am blinded at the moment, I can not trust my feelings, but only TRUST in what I know to be true from the LORD. Even if that is hard to do right now.

God Calling for today went along these same lines. No man has the power to disturb that Peace (that passes all understanding), but you yourselves can let the world and its worries and distractions in. You can give entrance to fears and despondency. You can open the door to the robber who breaks in upon and destroys, your Peace...Do not let those about you spoil your peace of heart and mind....set yourself to see that none of it touches the harmony of the real you, that is hid with Me in the Secret Place of the Father.

I am the person who is letting whatever it is in and disturbing my peace, though I am trying very hard to fight it. Funny, do you think GOD knew that I would be feeling this way today........so HE brought me some words in order that HE could guide me to what I know is true.

Again, I feel more alone today in this moment than I have in the past 11 months. And I know that my time in Korea was very much spent alone with only GOD. However, I PRAISE HIM, knowing that I do feel a certain way right now, but I'm not trusting those feelings.........I am fighting to TRUST in HIM alone.

HE still brought moments that were hugs from HIM tonight. Like while responding to emails with my computer on my lap, I had the most precious little blonde sitting on the arm of the chair with her version of a computer on her lap. GOD's hug. Then, as I went to a Bible Study tonight I was greeted by a friend whom I haven't seen in a year. He gave me a big hug and even lifted me off the ground. Two moments that made my heart smile today, KNOWING that GOD is GOD and right here with me in the mist of my feelings.

Some where recently I read the words "Purpose in our Hearts"...........today, it reminds me that I need to purpose in my heart what I know to be TRUE, not trust my feelings, but TRUST in GOD.

See HIM there....

I just got back from small group and I met the RISEN CHRIST there. "The Risen Christ" from "Living the Message" by Eugene Peterson from September 18 was shared.

What makes this so special is that I remembered the very first time I ever heard it. I felt tears come to my eyes because it seemed like such perfect timing to be hearing it again. I was able to reflect on a message that I have heard a few times over the past 5 years, but I remembered the first time and then realized in hearing it tonight how much hearing it that first time had and has changed my life. How this concept and message has become such a part of my every day daily life. And it reminded me how awesome GOD truly is.

I am going to share some from it and let Eugene Peterson's words speak for themselves:

In every visit, every meeting I attend, every appointment I keep, I have been anticipated. The Risen Christ got there ahead of me. The Risen Christ is in that room already. What is HE doing? What is HE saying? What is going on?...When I arrive and enter the room I am not so much wondering what I am going to do or say...as I am alert and observant for what the Risen Christ has been doing or saying that is making a gospel story out of this life...We are always coming in on something that is already going on. Sometimes we clarify a word or feeling, sometimes we identify an overlooked relationship, sometimes we help recover an essential piece of memory-but always we are dealing with what the Risen Christ has already set in motion, already brought into being.

I just sat in awe of how magnificent the RISEN CHRIST is and how much I have grown after hearing this particular message the first time and yet how every year I read it on September 18 have I been reminded of it...........but, mostly to have it STILL speak to me today.

Once again GOD's perfect timing. Makes me think about being home and getting settled. How I have almost done everything on my list that I wanted to do when I got back to the States. I am actually still waiting for three of my top five things to be honest. However, I am getting ready for one of those three to happen this weekend. I finally get to go up to the mountains, though it isn't for camping, it still is going up to be in the mountains. And just to add it is going to be a blast. For the other two, well they both require the same thing, well person................and, I am just reminded that it will all be in GOD's perfect timing. Praise Jesus for that!!

Roots and Wings

What an awesome trip I was able to go on. I met GOD in soooo many ways on this trip. I was reminded of my roots and were I come from. It was the community in which I grew up and the people in that small town of Jonesville, Michigan that helped me develop the character traits that make me me today. I know where I came from and I know to Whom I belong. I also know that HE gave me some pretty big wings that I have used in order to fly.

While on my trip to Pennsylvania to visit one of my bestest friends, I was driving on a part of the Ohio Turnpike near Arkon that brought back a memory from almost 20 years ago with my Dad and little Brother. It was so strong that I had to call my Brother and tell him how much I loved him. I had a million other moments like this throughout my whole trip. I had time with loved ones where I met the Risen Christ, as well as many moments alone driving in the car where HE was also met in such a beautiful way.

And the trip ended with a weekend spent at my class reunion and a family day at home. I just feel so blessed to have had an opportunity to be able to reflect on the past 20 years of my life. Wow, what an adventure it has been. GOD has been good.

As I was sitting down tonight to write this I had my quiet time first and of course, Our Daily Bread went along with some thoughts I been having about my trip once I was back in Colorado.

The author, Cindy Hess Kasper, wrote about a visit to Alaska to see Mt. McKinley and how she discovered that day that many people miss seeing the whole mountain because it is so tall that most of it is hidden on cloudy days. They only see a part of the whole. She went on to write: Often we're satisfied with our limited view of life. But Jeremiah 29:11 reminds us, "'I know the thoughts that I think toward you,' says the LORD, 'thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.'" With GOD's omniscient, panoramic view, HE sees the people HE wants us to help, the things HE wants us to accomplish, the character traits HE wants to develop in us. Proverbs 16:9 says, "A man's heart plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps." Our view of life is restricted by our humanness, but we can trust ourselves to the ONE who has an unlimited view!

ODB referenced Isaiah 55:6-9 and used Job 34:21, "His eyes are on the ways of man, and He sees all his steps."

GOD used this to speak to me...........I just love when HE does this. It reminds me of how awesome HE is.

There's so much now I cannot see,

My eyesight's far too dim,

But come what may, I'll simply trust

And leave it all to HIM.

--Overton

We see in part; GOD sees the whole.

Picture Perfect Moments

Wow, today there were two moments that were picture perfect............and I would have done anything to have my camera with me, but I didn't.

The first was coming back from Starbucks with the kids. As we were walking they got a little ahead of me, an adorable little boy from China and the cutest little blonde you ever saw. Two children born on opposite sides of the world, but by GOD's hand brought together........brought together to become family. I can't tell you in that beautiful moment how awesome it was to see GOD. To think so many thoughts, I wish I could put into words what I was feeling then and how it caused me to ponder so many more thoughts. Thoughts bigger than me, than anything at that moment. It was a moment to see the Risen Christ, to see the world, to only imagine how big GOD is and how wonderful a plan HE has for ALL of our lives. It was beautiful is all I can say. At one point they even got further ahead and were walking hand and hand.......oh, how I wish I had my camera to take a picture of those two moments, not to only have that memory of them, but the memory of the thoughts that GOD allowed me to experience right then.

The other moment was as I was driving, I drove by the biggest American flag that I have ever seen. The wind was blowing a storm in, so the sky was an unusual gray color as well. As the flag blew in the air soooo high, it was set against the back drop of the mountains, the majestic Rocky Mountains...........Again, so many thoughts came to my mind. How thankful I was for that American flag that I am sure soooo many of us just take for granted. However, after not seeing it for almost a year........made this seem even more amazing. I met GOD again in this moment.........the thoughts of the country I am from and yet, in awe of how awesome GOD is and the world HE created. I just can't come up with the words that would describe this moment..........I just know that I saw JESUS right then and there.....oh, how I wish I had my camera to have a memory of that moment, to remember my thoughts about GOD and what HE allowed me to feel right then.

I want to share some bits and pieces of 'God Calling' for today in closing: Our Lord, we love Thee and desire to live for Thee in all things....Think of the wonder of revelation still to be seen by those who live with Me. All these hundreds of years, and much of what I said and did is still mystery, much of My Life on Earth is still spiritually unexplored country. Only to the simple and the loving heart that walks with Me can these things be revealed....Look for the loving, the true, the kindly, the brave in the many all around you.

PRAISE JESUS, for these moments today and for speaking.

HE keeps doing it....

Yes, GOD has continued to speak to me throughout the past three days. It is just past midnight and I can not sleep so I thought I would share about how GOD just continues to speak to me..............It is just so awesome.

I went to church Saturday night with a friend and met HIM there. I saw and heard HIM Sunday morning at my church's service. And not to mention 'God Calling' for Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. He spoke to me in Sunday's 'Our Daily Bread', as well as in 'Living the Message'.

You will have to trust me that HE is speaking............It would be another really long blog entry if I shared all of what has been read and heard from HIM and the moments of opportunities to even speak with others. Just incredible.

I should also mention that I was flipping through 'Living the Message' and came upon February 22. It is titled "Wait and Hope", it spoke directly with and along side everything else. Again, as in the past, I am just experiencing HIS overwhelming magnificent love.

Because I am hearing and meeting HIM so much right now, I am looking forward to the trip I am about to take. I will be heading back to Michigan (and a little side trip to Pennsylvania) on the 4th for almost two weeks. I get to visit family and friends. I will also be attending my 20th class reunion, which I am really looking forward to. I know that I am going to meet and see the Risen Christ in each moment of this time.

Love and Laugh are two words that have popped up a few times in some reading and things the past few days, I think they are two things we all should experience on a daily basis. May you Love and Laugh today in some way.

I will leave you with just a little from 'God Calling' on June 30:
Take joy wherever you go. You have been much blessed. You are being much blessed. Such stores of blessing are awaiting you in the months and years that lie ahead. Pass every blessing on. Love can and does go round the world, passed on the God-currents from one to the other.

HE just continues to amaze me in the ways HE speaks and moves...........Oh, HE is just so loud and clear to me right now. Can it get any better?

Silence ended....

As I stated earlier this week, GOD seems to be quiet in my life lately. I mean, after all, HE has been very present and very loud over the past year or so of my life. Don't get me wrong, HE has been here in every moment since I have returned to the States, it just has been in the ordinary, everyday things and just hasn't seemed as bold as while I was in Korea. HE has been in each smile, each email, each phone call, each blue sky, etc.........I could go on and on. He has been here, it just seems very quiet to me and so different than it has been.

That was of course until yesterday, HE finally spoke through the circumstances of my day. The moments I had, as well as through 'God Calling' and 'Our Daily Bread'. I haven't heard HIM through those books in a while.

I went on an interview yesterday that was so refreshing. It was awesome to see GOD working and moving in a place. Actually, both my interviews this week were like that. In both schools it was so obvious that the presence of the LORD was there. You could feel HIM. Plus, with yesterday, the principal had read my blog.............it was amazing and so GOD to me to hear him tell me about what he learned about me from my writing................PRAISE JESUS is all that I can say. What a moment and opportunity to see HIM in.

Last night I saw GOD again in a couple of different ways. I was reminded of a great girl's Bible study I use to be a part of. I got to celebrate the Birthday of a friend whom I have known my whole time in Denver, we were asked how we met and it was just awesome to see how GOD's hand was a part of it. Then personally, I got complemented in a few different ways, it would take me a long time to explain this one.........so you will just have to trust me, that for me, it was a GOD MOMENT. Thank you LORD for the hug and the reminder.

Then I came home and read from 'God Calling'.............It has not been in vain this training and teaching time. The time of suppression, repression, depression is changed now into a time of glorious expression. Life is flooded through and through with Joy and Gladness. Indeed I have prepared a table of delights, a feast of all good things for you. Indeed your cup runneth over and you can feel from the very depth of your heart. "Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever."

It just spoke volumes to my heart and was exactly what I needed to hear. And then since I didn't get a chance in the morning to read 'Our Daily Bread' for June 28th.........I read that as well. It was about Flexibility and used James 4:13-17.

Bill Crowder wrote...Life has an element of unpredictability for which flexibility is the best response....While it is wise to plan for the future, we must do so with the recognition that God's purposes might be different from ours....The adventure of following Christ is one that rests in His perfect plans- and flexibility helps us to be prepared for wherever His purposes might take us. I think of Proverbs 19:21.

TODAY's 'God Calling' just added on to this. "My Will-Your Joy" Our Lord and our God. Lead us, we beseech Thee. Lead us and keep us. You can never go beyond My Love and Care. Remember that. No evil can befall you. Circumstances I bless and use must be the right ones for you. But I know always that the first step is to lay your will before Me as an offering, ready that I shall do what is best, sure that, if you trust Me, what I do for you will be best. Your second step is to be sure, and to tell me so, that I am Powerful enough to do everything, that no miracle is impossible with me. Then leave all with Me. Glad to leave all your affairs in a Master Hand. Sure of safety and protection. Remember you cannot see the future. I can. You could not bear it. So only little by little can I reveal it to you. Accept My Will and it will bring you joy.

Ok, wow....I don't know what I was thinking. You have no idea how many different things in my life these things speak directly to and about..........so many more things that I can not even begin to share here (though a few of you may know what that is- isn't it perfect words from HIM). I just can't say enough how awesome GOD is and how wonderful HE is, as well as how excited I am to hear HIM presently here in Colorado. I can't wait to see how the future will all unfold. So much is happening and being processed in and through me right now, and HE spoke so loud and clear in these words. Again and again, THANK YOU LORD!

He does not lead me year by year,

Nor even day by day;

But step by step my path unfolds;

My Lord directs my way.

-Ryberg

A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps. Proverbs 16:9

PRAISE JESUS!!

Job Search

Well, I have been taking lots of phone calls and very busy trying to find a teaching job for the following school year. It has been exciting watching GOD unfold HIS plan............I am enjoying searching at the moment. I just don't want to miss HIS voice in all of it. HE has been speaking very loudly for say the past almost 20 or so months of my life............and right now, HE seems much more quiet than HE has been. Plus, I feel HE is giving me a little choice in it this time.

Two months ago I had inquired with 27 schools in the Denver area. As of today, I have heard from all of them but 7. That is pretty cool.

Since returning to the States, I have been on three interviews, and presently have 4 more applications to fill out. Oh, I have even been offered a job at one school. However, I felt I needed to turn it down. It is too far away from where I am living presently.....and even farther from where my condo is, when and if I move back into that after this next year. Plus, I must add the salary wasn't that great of an offer..........so considering that along with the distance and gas prices. I felt led by the Lord to say no. Plus, I have a few other possibilities in the works.

The thing about this whole process is having the Peace that I do at the moment. I know that GOD called me back home and spoke so loud and clear that particular day in Bali.............I can't doubt. I know that I will be teaching............I just don't know where yet. And I have to keep in mind, that I am looking at the situation considering the 'Present', but GOD also knows my 'Tomorrow'..............so all I can do is to keep taking the steps and TRUST HIM!!

But you all can still pray for me..............I'd really like to teach 3rd Grade, but I am actually open to being where the LORD would want me............that includes any grade as well. And remember, I did write that I have a feeling that at some point I will be working with youth again.........so, I can't rule out high school either.

GOD sure does know what HE is doing. Hope you are finding the Risen Christ in the moments of your days as well.

Hair Cut.....

Yesterday I cut my hair to donate to 'Locks of Love' again. I donated it in Judy Franke's name, but also in memory of Noah Steven Graves.

So 11 inches came off my head, and my hair is still at my shoulders.............that was a Praise Jesus. I even did something a little more fun this time.

I can't tell you how awesome it feels to know that by growing your hair out, then cutting it off, you can bless the life of someone else. My hair can benefit someone. I know this is what I will continue to do.........let my hair grow out and then cut it, grow it again, cut it again, etc.......

To know somewhere some little girl is going to be given back something just by the tiny little act of cutting your hair is an amazing thing.

This time I must add after being gone and coming back, feeling changed and needing change.........well, this is an easy thing to do and I got to cut off all the pollution and junk from my hair. It feels new and fresh...........if that makes any sense to anyone.

I feel that I can have a little more fun and be a bit more flirtatious at the moment..............so watch out and beware.

Oh, I gotta add that it was cool stopping by the place that carries the conditioner I like to buy. It is the only place I have found that carries it. Anyways, the last time I was in there was a year ago. When I checked to day, the owner was there and said, "Aren't you the one who went to Korea? How was it?". I was shocked, yet overwhelmed that she would remember me. Seriously, it has been a year since I went and bought enough conditioner to last me during my time in Korea. Just an awesome opportunity and moment to meet the Risen Christ in.

Faces FULL of Smiles!

I went to Elitch's yesterday after church for a Birthday Party...... I must say there are some very interesting people who are walking around there. I felt like I was in a different country....or maybe it is really what most of America is like....and I am different, as well as, the people whom I am surrounded by. I don't think we are the norm, so to speak.

The best part was seeing the smiles on the kids faces having so much fun. It was a beautiful, very hot day to see the love of Christ reflected in them.

One highlight for me was riding on 'The Twister 2' with Jackson. What made it soooo special was it was his first time to ride a big roller coaster. He was now tall enough and I got to experience it with him. After the first (little) hill he leaned over and said this is fun.....but then the next three came along with an "oh", fearful look, and "I don't like this, Kimie". However, by the end he said it was ok, but didn't want to ride it again. It was an awesome moment I was glad I got to experience with him.

Another moment, was when Catie wanted to ride the balloons (around the world in 80 seconds)....kind of like the spinning tea cups at Disney World, yet went up and down as well.....her brothers wanted to ride something else, so I told her mom I would stay with her. You gotta know its love, she begged me to ride it with her. She just kept spinning that thing around and around.............I think I am getting to old for those kind of rides, for they make me sick. I closed my eyes while we were spinning, especially after she asked me to spin us faster. I just couldn't say no. In that moment to see the smile upon her face and to hear her laughter........well, it was priceless.

Later Allyson and I were sitting watching three of the kids on a ride together............watching Jack especially. I know I don't have the words to express the smile and laughter we saw. It brought tears to my eyes............and to think about the missed moments by so many who have ignored the call that GOD has placed upon on their lives to maybe adopt. To see what we saw in that moment, what an amazing gift and smile from GOD.

The last thing was when we left the park and went to eat at Chipotle. I was with two families whom are very special to me. As I was getting ready to leave and go outside where the six kids were. I man walked by and said, "that is some group of kids".....or something to that fact. He was making a VERY POSITIVE statement about them. My response was "they sure are." I smiled knowing how very special I felt to have such wonderful little ones in my life.........whom I love so very much, but yet, for some reason I have done something for them to return that love back to me even more.

Praise Jesus for these precious faces so full of smiles and love!!

Blue Skies....

I just love being outside walking with the kids and just Praising Jesus for EVERYTHING!!!!

That is what we did today..........we Thanked and Praised HIM for everything we could think of.

As I was Praising HIM again for the Blue sky, I got thinking about what the word "blue" means in our language. And well, it isn't really a happy thing now is it. Yet, at this moment in my life...........'blue' is an amazing word for me because it makes me think about the BEAUTIFUL BLUE SKY that I have been seeing everyday since I have been back.

The BLUE sky, plus the amazing SUNSETS I have seen each night since my return to the States has been an amazing reminder of just how awesome GOD truly is.

Makes me want to throw up my arms in the air and say "Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever."

You know I think you can find those words in Psalm 106:1............and maybe even a few other places in the Bible.

Thank you Lord, for Your constant love and reminders each and every day.

Father's Day

Stir up the gift of God which is in you

through the laying on of my hands.

2 Timothy 1:6

God gives us children for a time

To nuture and to love,

To give them our encouragement,

With wisdon from above.

- Sper

The greatest gift a father can give his children is himself.

I love AMERICA...

Today I walked up to the Bank with Catie and Jack. Afterwards we decided to go and treat ourselves to Starbucks. I do need to make up for all those months of not drinking what I LIKE.

Anyways, I just loved the walk up there. To see the mountains GOD created, to see the blue sky and white clouds. To hear the laughter of the children I was with. Just amazing. Praise GOD!!

But then also, to have people wave at me whom I don't know. Not stare at me because I look different, but to give a friendly wave. And every time we had to cross a street the cars let us go first. This is just SOOOO DIFFERENT from what I am use to the past 10 months of my life, but what an awesome reminder from GOD as to how wonderful a place I get to call home is.

Everything around me is just feeling normal. Now I just wish I could feel like myself again. That is the one thing that doesn't feel right yet, ME! But I know and trust GOD, HE'll have me where HE wants me in no time at all. And until that time, I am just going to enjoy the process that HE is taking me through.

After all, this still is ALL ABOUT HIM!!

HOME!!

It is good to be home.

I was very thankful that the Sullivan's hung out at the airport with me for a little while having coffee before I left Seoul. It made it not seem as long.

My original flight had already been delayed 20 minutes when I checked in in the morning, but by the time it was all said and done and I was on the plane, it was more like an hour delay from the scheduled flight. This normally wouldn't have been a problem, but knowing how ready I was to come home............well, it seemed liked forever.

I didn't get to sleep on the plane as much as I was hoping.........I even pulled my neck during my last round of sleep from Seoul to LA, and then my heavy bags were no help to this problem.

Enough of the boring plane ride...........it was great landing in LA..........wow, everywhere I looked there was so much diversity. I just kept saying "Praise Jesus". The guy at customs asked me a question and I responded that I was so glad to be home that I could jump over this wall and give him a big hug and kiss..............and do you know what he actually did? He leaned over and gave me a huge hug. What a welcome home. I couldn't help but smile everywhere I went. I had over 3 hours to just sit and watch people, thanking God every minute for the country I am from. Praise the Lord.

The first thing I treated myself to (thanks to Luke's gift card) was a 'venti, decaf, sugar-free vanilla, breve latte' from the Starbucks right by my gate. The best I think I have ever had.

I slept most of the flight from LA to Denver............especially because my neck was in soooo much pain. Though right as we were getting ready to land the plane began to turn around and the pilot said that due to a thunder storm that had just gone through we would be held up in landing for a few minutes. Ok, this is when I lost it and began tearing up. The poor man next to me asked if I was ok, I just told him that I had been gone for the past 10 months and just didn't want to wait any longer to get home. He then asked me a whole bunch more questions about my experience and it was a really nice moment given by God to speak to this man. Plus, it made the wait go by fast.

When I finally arrived I again teared up on the train to the main terminal. I was just so excited and anxious about the faces I was about to see. I saw Craig first as I was coming up the escalator and then at the top he guided me to a very large white sign held by three awesome girlfriends (Allyson, Sheli, and Claire)..............and then I was GREETED BY 8 OF THE MOST AMAZING KIDS EVER....Caroline, Catie, Katherine, Jack, Jack, Calvin, Curtis, and Zac. Once I got those smiles and hugs.................EVERYTHING was OK!!!!

By the time we got my bags and got in the car and headed out for my third treat of my return to Chipotle, the three adults in the car felt like it was normal for me to be there, as if 10 months hadn't past. It was very cool. The only difference from say a normal Sunday in the car with this family, was that 4 of them kept trying to talk and keep my attention at the same time. But hey, we do have a few months to catch up on.

I can just say, "Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever." Psalm 106:1...............and PRAISE JESUS I am HOME!!

It is Finished....

Today was my last day, it was very hard to say good-bye to my students. I wanted to say so much..........but as soon as I started I was crying. I pretty much told them that I loved them, would miss them, and was proud of them. Then through tears I said you can pack up and go now. I had planned on saying more..............but couldn't.

Our Daily Bread was PERFECT for today. God knows that is what we read for our devotions every morning as a class, and though this one was written way before today it was a GOD ending to a very rough and beautiful year with the amazing class I had.

It was titled 'Thanksgiving All Year' and used the scripture reference 1 Chronicles 16:8-12, 23-34. Verse 34 says, "Oh, give thanks to the Lord, for He is good! His love endures forever."

How perfect is that for an ending..............knowing that we made our class verse Psalms 106:1, Praise the Lord! Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever.

I want to share the letter I wrote to my class, which was used in the year book. I wanted to use the words that we had hidden in our hearts. It is how I feel and how I wanted them to remember this year. Praise Jesus!! for them and with them. My heart will not be the same after these precious children of His have touched it.

Dear Class,
You bless me daily by not only loving with words or tongue, but with your actions and in truth (1 John 3:18). I love the way you ALL show love each day. Your love, by giving your hearts, has been evident praying for Baby Noah and his family; remaining “present” in the moments God gives us daily; and sharing “JOY” everyday. You have not only hidden the Word in your hearts (Psalm 119:11), but you have done your best to present yourselves to God as ones approved, whom aren't ashamed to handle the word of Truth (2 Timothy 2:15).

“For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints, and His comparably great power for us who believe.” (Ephesians 1:15-19)

I want you to remember, whatever happens, always conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the Gospel of Christ (Philippians 1:27), and don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example in all you do. Be diligent and watch your life. Preserve, so you will save both yourselves and your hearers. (1 Timothy 4: 12, 15-16). Be sure to fear the Lord and serve Him faithfully with all you heart, considering all He has done (1 Samuel 12:24). Wilson said to remind you to always raise your arms and say “PRAISE JESUS” no matter how dark it gets.

I love you ALL with all of my heart. May the God of peace equip you for doing His will (Hebrews 13:21). I pray that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way: bearing fruit in all you do, growing in the knowledge of Him (Colossians 1:10).

You will ALWAYS be in my heart, when daily I say “PRAISE THE LORD. GIVE THANKS TO THE LORD, FOR HE IS GOOD; HIS LOVE ENDURES FOREVER.” Psalm 106:1

Embracing God Moments,
Miss Morton

Actions louder than....

Wow, I could have not chosen better words to share with my class during devotions today. It was the last day completely together. Tomorrow, we will have devotions, but then it is ALL school stuff. So today was my last day to be wrapped in Jesus' arms with them, to get some 'meat' along with our daily bread.

And that is exactly what we read today, Our Daily Bread. It was titled 'Actions Speak Louder' and used scripture from Matthew 9:1-8

It had a quote, "Don't tell me what you're going to do- tell me what you've done." This was perfect in the fact that all year we have been talking about showing and sharing Christ's love without saying anything. Spreading outrageous, contagious JOY. Especially at the end of school..........I don't know how many times I have said, "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth "(1 John 3:18 NIV) to them.

ODB concluded with this:
Jesus' actions supported His words, and so should ours. John wrote, "My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth" (1 John 3:18). What we say is significant to a watching world only if it's consistent with what we do. As we tell people about Christ's love, those words will communicate powerfully if surrounded by acts of love and kindness. Actions do speak louder!

Verse 6 in Matthew 9 says, "Get up, take your mat and go home." This is the part that spoke to me..........and I don't know how to explain how it did, but at the time I read it it was as if God was saying this exactly to me. I think it spoke volumes when I consider two conversations I have had with other people in regard to this exact scripture in the past year. It was a beautiful moment with Him and a finish for me, it is time to get up and go home. Numerous other things surrounding this week add to why it was perfect for such a time as this. If that makes any sense!?

I want to add that after I read this I remembered that in my Bible I have written: People will listen to you carefully, if they see you living faithfully. This is written by 1 Peter 2:15, "For it is God's will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish men."

Thank you Lord, for making one of our last daily breads together be exactly what you have been trying to teach my students all year. And thanks for putting a finish to my time here as well.

Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever. Psalm 106:1

Second Graders Speak.....

I heard and saw GOD tonight through the second grade classes at YISS (Yongsan International School of Seoul).

They did a play called "Psalty's Camping Adventure: Count It All With Joy!" They were going on a camping trip and hiking up a mountain..............they sang many songs about GOD. It touched my heart in many ways.

Comments, like hearing complaints about the hike up the mountain, eating 'GRAP' (for those of you who don't know it means: granola, raisins, and peanuts), and the best one, Fresh Air, made me think about memories from times I have gone backpacking, camping, and hiking in the mountains of the place I call home.

It also made me look ahead to my return home and hopefully some opportunities this summer to do these things..........but, mainly looking forward to being home and fresh air.

It also had me reflect on my time here.........consider the idea of climbing mountains in our walk as a phrase to talk about the challenges we face in our journey. As well as, considering mountain top experiences....

Basically, I was reminded of the past, was reflecting on the present, and was looking ahead to tomorrow with Hope and excitement in returning home. And GOD used 2nd Graders to reveal HIMself in my Heart in these ways tonight.

Praise the Lord!..................................Psalm 106:1

Isaiah 43:5-6

King James says: 5 Fear not: for I am with thee: I will bring thy seed from the east, and gather thee from the west; 6 I will say to the north, Give up; and to the south, Keep not back: bring my sons from far, and my daughters from the ends of the earth;

And NIV says: 5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. 6 I will say to the north, 'Give them up!' and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.' Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth-

As I was sitting in church this morning listening to the testimony of a young man who is a student in Seoul, but from North Korea this scripture came to mind again.

On May 23, the 2nd to 5th Graders took a field trip to Holt Ilsan Center. One of my students noticed an open Bible in a display case. The Bible was opened to Isaiah 43 and the above scripture was highlighted. It made us think of North and South Korea.

Again, this morning it came to my mind and sadden me to think about the things that people continue to make themselves blind to in this world. There is a school here that is reaching out to these North Korean refugees, but it is still so hard to think about the cruelty that is taking place around the world, yet we as Christians are so unaware of.

My heart has just been heavy today thinking about the people of North Korea, and how people are blind to what is going on. I thought about all the refugees in Thailand and the orphans at Holt Center.......AND I WANTED TO DO SOMETHING MORE THAN PRAY!!!!

If only the North would give them up and the South would not hold them back........

Happy Birthday!!

What a special day my class made for me.

This has to make my list of BESTEST Birthdays and it's because they all reflected the Love of JESUS today. They all really surprised me.

I love their hearts!!!! I saw the Risen Christ in them today in so many ways and that was the BEST gift ever. I am blessed to be able to love and PRAISE JESUS with them.



My hope and prayer is that they continue to let the SONshine with their JOY!!



I shared two quotes with them on our class blog the other day. One is about JOY, since it is something we have talked about all year. JOY being putting Jesus and Others before Yourself. The other was about bringing sunshine into lives. I actually changed sun to SON..............they just seem right to post here too.

I fling JOY- beyond my next-door neighbor's fence, clear across town, and into the universe. Then it curves right back to me. Sometimes with a whack on the head when I need it. Sometimes with a thwack into my heart. Sometimes landing with a crack at my feet. But it always comes back. No doubt about it. by Barbara Johnson

When we bring 'SONSHINE' into the lives of others, we're warmed by it ourselves. When we spill a little happiness, it splashes on us. HOPE uncovers new possibilities and shows us what can be done. It wrestles with angels, looks impossibilities in the eye and winks. Hope springs eternal. Hope supersedes all good intentions. Keep going by the power of GOD's grace. Dare to believe that HE has planned greater things right around the corner. by Barbara Johnson

Again, this was a very special day for me. Thanks to my class and all my other loved ones who sent a wish. What a beautiful day to see the reflection of GOD's love. And I just happened to turn another year older.........I pray that the next year in my life is even more a reflection of who CHRIST IS!!!! For I want my life to be ALL about HIM, not me.

God Always Has a Plan B

I was given a book with this title as a source of encouragement. I recently finished reading it and 5 quotes really stand out in my mind that I want to share. I think they say exactly what has been on my heart a few different times recently. They speak my thoughts much better than I could, so here they are:

PEOPLE need each other-- no matter how much we insist we don't. Nobody is an island, an entity unto herself, or a Lone Ranger. We're in this thing called community, and part of the joy of community is sharing the weight. The weight of burdens, losses, loneliness, and fear. Look around you, my friend. Who's there for you? And who are you there for? Take a careful look. Even those who insist they can make it on their own may just be waiting for you to reach out and help. Be there and available. ---Luci Swindoll

I have always felt blessed by the community of people that GOD has brought to my journey. After being away these past months, I know even more how special they are to me. How much they mean to my life and how very much I love and miss them.

WE come to God with nothing and we are given everything. There is nothing you can do to earn it, to be worthy of this love. It is a gift. ---Shelia Walsh

So,
LIVE every day to fulfill your personal mission. God has a reason for whatever season you are living through right now. A season of loss or blessing? A season of activity or hibernation? A season of growth or incubation? You may think you're on a detour, but God knows the best way for you to reach your destination. ---Barbara Johnson

And
OVER the years, God has been faithful to his work, protecting me and providing for me at every turn. I've never regretted my decision to trust God. My experience underscores the importance of those few profound moments in each person's life, where a significant choice is to be made. Moments when the choice to walk with God, or to go our own way, will have consequences for the rest of our lives. It is at such times that our compassionate Father draws closest, whispering love and hope in our hearts. ---Ritz Schweitz

Therefore,
OUR capacity to feel, to think, and to experience is so great- to taste the sweetness of joy that life can bring, to bask in the peace of God, to worship on the mountaintops, to ride high on loving and being loved. All of these are wonderful and precious gifts, and I'm so thankful for them as I journey through this earthly life. ---Kathy Troccoli

Praise JESUS, for it is what this journey is all about!!

God filled good-bye

Today was the last day at the church for Pastor Tim. We had a picnic and a time of sharing and thanking after service. A moment in time soooo filled with the abundant love and presence of GOD.

All I can do is Praise HIM for allowing this pastor and this body to be a huge source in meeting and finding HIM on a weekly basis, while I was here in Korea.

What a unique church filled with so many from so many different countries. A place where this pastor allowed the Holy Spirit to move and have control of each and every service. He is going to be missed by many here, but though he is leaving..........the presence of the LORD will remain.

Time Well Wasted

This is actually the name of a country album by Brad Paisley, but it is interesting how it fit into my thoughts of the weekend.

I was praying and questioning if I had wasted time here or if I had really spent the most of every opportunity and moment that I have been a part of. I feel like I have given my all and been present every day, seizing the moments with GOD's abundant love, and meeting the RISEN CHRIST in so many ways. Yet, did I still waste time? Could I have given more?

And then as GOD always does..........HE spoke directly to my heart and gave me an answer to my questioning.

Sunday morning, Pastor Tim spoke on Ephesians 5:1-21. He had three points: 1. Walk in love, 2. Walk in God's light, and 3. Walk in His wisdom.

He asked what we would do if we were given $86,400 every day, but we had to spend it all that day. We could invest it, buy things, etc......we just couldn't carry any of it over to the next day. But remember that we would get another $86,400 then.

Ok, so we wouldn't get that much money every day, but we are given 86,400 seconds every day and at the end of it every second is spent. Once the time is gone you can never get it back.

We need to invest or spend time with GOD, which is NEVER WASTED. We also need to invest time with others, making every effort to encourage one another with an attitude of Praise. And spend time with ourselves in gratitude.

Do you know that time spent laughing improves the quality of life? My heart feels like it has been forever since I have truly laughed........I look forward to lots of moments of laughter once I am home.

Pastor Tim encouraged us to make the most of our time and invest ourselves where we are. Once he said this, I got the warmest feeling in my heart.

He went on to mention his time here in Korea and the many people he met in his 13 years who had wasted time.

Then the REAL part hit home in my heart. It was something I had never heard or at least considered before. Numerous times I have heard messages about planting seed, watering, and harvesting, but Pastor Tim mentioned 'plowing'. He said maybe some are called to break up fallow ground, this is tough and may make you feel crushed. He stated that the hardest work was being used as a plow.

He concluded with saying, "You may not know where their heart is, but the Holy Spirit will use you if you invest your time where He has placed you." You won't know if that is to PLOW, SEED, WATER, or HARVEST.

I realized I have been here to plow fallow ground. Fallow, by the way, means plowed and left unseeded for a season or more. Yet, I have also been witness to planting seed, watering, and reaping a harvest in many ways. All other stories in their self which I haven't shared.

PRAISE THE LORD.......HIS Love endures forever! (Psalm 106:1)

I must add how the album title came into play. Sunday night I was looking at some downloaded songs someone had shared with me. One of those songs was on this album and the whole thing was downloaded. I just found it interesting that it fit into my thoughts.

Not to mention, Our Daily Bread touched me too and continued my thoughts. I read both Sunday's and Monday's (getting ahead for the week with my students). Of course, you can go read these for yourself if you want.

However, Sunday's is titled "He Wants More" GOD loves you and wants you to know HIM. -Cindy Hess Kasper

And Monday's is titled "On Purpose" Glorifying GOD means putting HIS character, HIS will, and HIS ways into action in all that we do.......The purpose of our lives is to let others see what GOD is like as they watch and experience HIS love through us. What a profound privilege it is to mirror GOD's love, mercy, grace, justice, and righteousness to a world whose heart is "veiled" to GOD's truth! (2 Corinthians 4:3-4). Our purpose is to show others less of us and more of HIM. That's living on purpose with a purpose!- Joe Stowell

I can only Hope that I live my life this way. After all, I'm not anyone special and definitely not qualified.......just a girl from a small, little town in southern Michigan, who's desire is to live each moment on purpose with a purpose of showing less of me and soooo much more of HIM!

And as the words of the song go........may it be time well wasted!

Skirt

The skirt I wore today brought memories and a time of reflection and revelation to my heart.

I bought myself this skirt as a Birthday gift last year (though I used the gift card I was given at Christmas by my parents to purchase it).

With it on today, I recalled the very first time I wore this skirt. It was Sunday before my Birthday. I was pretty bold, even for me, after church. A day that revealed lots to me. A day filled with many blessings and possibilities from God.

Then, I recalled the last time in Denver I wore this skirt. It was a Saturday, the day before I left to come to Seoul, South Korea. I remembered standing in the garage of the family who means so much to me in my heart, watching a car pull up and feeling my heart skip a beat when an amazing person got out and walked towards me. An unbelievable moment for me that feels like it only happened yesterday. A moment I felt so much Hope.

Later that day, I got to jump on a trampoline in my skirt with some of the most awesome kids I know and love soooo very much. At that moment, I looked up and saw the faces of so many who have been a part of my journey thus far, at least in Denver. A moment I felt so much Love.

These memories came in the midst of a day when I felt as though I had no strength left. I wondered how I was really going to make it the next 26 days. Well, I know I will make it, but I know I can't do it. It will be the LORD who cares me through.

I needed these memories today more than I can express. They were a loving touch from God. However, at the same time I felt so much anxiety about coming home. They revealed to me what it is I am afraid of. I know I have lost a little bit of who I am, or at least was. I am afraid that I won't get that part of me back.

And with my Birthday fast approaching, knowing I am ever getting closer to '40', I notice how much gray is in my hair. I have never had this much before. The gray reminds me how tough this has been for me and on my heart.

I guess I'll just have to get my hair highlighted when I cut it to donate again. Though, I don't know if my heart will ever be the same.

Mother's Day

Her children rise up and call her blessed;

her husband also, and he praises her.

Proverbs 31:28

Of all the earthly things GOD gives,

There's one above all others:

It is the precious, priceless gift

Of loving Christian mothers.

--Anon.

Adventure Ahead?!

Our Daily Bread for Tuesday, May 8, 2007, Titled 'THE ADVENTURE', got me really thinking about the next adventure in my life. WE ALL KNOW that every single day and part of my life has been and is an adventure in itself.

ODB used Esther 4:13-17, emphasizing verse 14. "Who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?"

Then stated, "Adventures can be fun- and scary. They usually involve a bit of the unknown. As we walk in fellowship with GOD, it's likely that our lives will have many unique adventures-opportunities to serve HIM. If we're reluctant or scared and we turn down an opportunity, we miss out. Will God still get the job done? Of course. But someone else will receive the blessing....Esther was naturally frightened to take this assignment. But GOD used her courage and faith to deliver her people. Trust GOD to show you the way. Adventure ahead!"- Cindy Hess Kasper

This came in GOD's perfect timing for me. I have no idea what my tomorrow holds, other than I am moving back to Denver and where I will be living. And waiting for all of GOD's words in Bali to play out in HIS Plan. I think of Jeremiah 29:11 (even 12-13) at this moment.

Anyway, I came back from Bangkok and really felt an urge to send my resume to other Christian schools in the Denver area. So Sunday night I sent 26 emails out. I was still hoping for a job at my school from last year....but on Monday I received an email letting me know that they would be closing. God prompted my heart and I listened.

So at this moment, I have no idea what is in store for me when I get HOME. However, I am trusting God to show me the way. I am just ready for more moments to meet the Risen Christ in.

As I wrote the other day, 2 Corinthians 1:9b "But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on GOD."

Praise Jesus!! and Adventure ahead!

Sawasdee Ka

I just got home from spending a couple of days in Bangkok, Thailand.

It was an opportunity that God put before me and I seized the moment to experience the city I REALLY wanted to work in.

It was an interesting and fast weekend..........but hey, I got to eat sticky rice and mango with coconut milk again.

I really love the Thai people........and pray that I can go back some day in the future.

Again....!?

The message from church this morning can be summed up by saying God calls, we believe, and GO! The scripture used was Genesis 12:1-8.

God is calling Christians to GO to someone, somewhere.

And of course, you know that Teach Me To Pray, God Calling, and Our Daily Bread for April 22, went right along with my thoughts today.

I keep saying that again and again, God continues to speak to me about exactly what is happening around me, etc..... Well, duh!!!!

If HE is in EVERYTHING, as Psalms 24:1 says "The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it." And if we are walking in HIS Will, then doesn't EVERYTHING point us to HIM!? And wouldn't EVERYTHING be about HIM!?

ODB (which you can click on the link to the right and read for yourself) used 2 Corinthians 1:3-11. The author used "Lord of the Rings" where Frodo is reflecting on his journey and saying to Gandalf that he wished the ring had never come to him. Ganadalf replies, "So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All you must decide is how to use the time that is given to you."

God Calling stated "Trust in Me. Do as I say each moment and all indeed shall be well. Follow out My commands. Change all disappointment, even if only momentary, into Joy. Change each complaint into laughter. Rest-Love-Joy-Peace-Work, and the most powerful of these are Love and Joy."

Teach Me to Pray stated "The new life in Christ Jesus is to be the unfolding of God's love in Christ." It then used John 15:9-13. And ended with, "Can words make it plainer that the love with which the Father loved the Son is to be in us?...This love must be rooted in the faith of God's love to Christ coming into our hearts and showing itself in obedience to His commandments and in love to one another."

I also read 1 Corinthians 16:14, "Do everything in love." If God is Love, then that states we should do everything in HIM.

GOD is calling Christians to GO to someone, somewhere. We must decide how to use the time that has been given to us." Can you Trust HIM enough to Obey HIM, to Follow HIS Commands? HE commands us to Love HIM with EVERYTHING we have and to Love others as we Love ourselves. When you hear HIS Voice, will you listen to HIS Call? Will you Believe what HIS Word says? Will you do what your Heart is prompting you to do? Will you step out of your comfort and GO?

That could be going to your neighbor in need; calling a friend whom GOD has put on your heart; praying for someone when they come to your mind; being present in the moments GOD places before you; and in those moments, being honest and taking risks without Fear of tomorrow by trusting HIM.

As I reflect on my time in Korea, on all the things I have seen or felt while here, the words that hit my heart the most right now are from 2 Corinthians 1:9b "But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on GOD."

No Regrets.....

Because of some responses in emails I wanted to clarify something.

I am ready to come home, but I want you all to know that I don't regret a day or a moment here. This has been a very hard journey, but I am very thankful for this time and opportunity that God has given to me. I have learned so much and have grown in ways I could have never imagined. Yes, this wasn't at all the way I had dreamed it would be, but yet............it has been an incredible opportunity to embrace life fully and abundantly in and with GOD's love by meeting the RISEN CHRIST in each and every moment of it.

Christ has called us to live in HIM, in HIS abundant love. I would rather die in the center of GOD's Will, than be outside of it. Again, my life is nothing to me, because it is EVERYTHING to HIM.

Just now, GOD took me to Matthew 10.......WOW!!

And the fact that, April 21st Our Daily Bread, God Calling, and Teach Me To Pray all went with what GOD has been speaking and revealing to me. Again, WOW!!!! I won't share them because I want to keep this short, but I just sit in awe right now of HIS overwhelming, magnificent Ways.

Why?

I had two young Korean men come by tonight and ask me why I thought this most recent tragedy had taken place in our world.

I answered that it was because there was evil in our world and that our only hope was in Jesus Christ.

They continued to go to scripture and asked me questions about it, yet they seemed very blown away by the fact that I had an answer for every question. Also that I didn't need my Bible to share scripture with them in my answers.

It was very much a GOD moment, I did ask them if I could ask them a question.....which was since I knew the scriptures they were talking about what was there reason for asking me their questions. You know I NEVER did get an answer and I am pretty sure they were from the same church like the others who have tried to witness to me.........even knowing that I am a Christian. Or maybe they asked because they really don't know what they really believe so they were asking question to help themselves understand the Word. They asked if they could come back again to finish asking me about the scriptures.

Now why would someone want to come back to witness to someone who obviously knows the Risen Christ? Can anyone answer that for me?

Crossing Sea to Other Side

God has just continued to bless and speak all day. He has been in EVERYTHING today.

Especially tonight at the Bible Study I attend here. We are in Beth Moore's Jesus the One and Only study. Tonight we watched session 4, which took us to Luke 8:22-27. She spoke on some important considerations for those who are willing to cross over with Jesus to "the other side".

I took pages and pages of notes on what she was saying. It just confirmed EVERYTHING that is happening around me here, along with the messages from Be The Change at Pathways. Not to mention just finishing the book "The Cross and The Switchblade". And as always, through my devotionals. A few people even sent emails with devotions or scriptures. It has been an unbelievable GOD filled day. Oh, to BE THE CHANGE with LOVE IN ACTION.

I would love to write all of what I took in today, but I will save you from reading a really long entry and just write this:

If it is NOT GOD, it is NOT going to work. We need to breathe in and breathe out the TRUTH in the WORD.

My life is nothing "to me" because it is EVERYTHING to HIM.
Acts 20:24 However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me- the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.

The gates have swung open....

I sat down earlier tonight and started to write about the urgent, serious prayer request I sent a week ago. Yet, I couldn't put words to the page again. So I gave it a title and went about doing some things around the house. Then I watched a movie I had sitting by the TV. Movies are scarce, a few were left by previous teachers. I hadn't seen "The Postman" yet and I was drawn to it tonight.

The movie was about 'hope'. Wow, is all I can say to how awesome GOD is. It truly was HIM who prompted my heart to watch it. It is what I needed and now I know I need to share. Maybe you'll see why it was GOD's perfect timing in watching this movie after you read this.

I was going to begin this entry with the fact that I have never felt or experienced so much evil in my life. I came home today from a half a day of classes feeling very heavy, neck pain, just plain filthy, wanting to vomit, and feeling like I needed to clean or pull something from myself. This is something I have felt in the past, but not since Momentus in April 1999.

Last week, when I sent out the prayer request it was because the gates of hell had swung wide open here. Someone in our midst led the enemy right in. I saw soooo many hearts broken and/or devastated last week. I won't lie, he even tried to get at me................Praise JESUS, I was able to stand strong because of HIM. I know it was because GOD had sent the love that HE had the week before. HE knew what was coming, heck the night before I even received an email that had the words "Fight the good fight" in it. Definitely GOD preparing my heart.

Let me simply list those things: Two students have been kicked out of our school, a teachers heart was broken because they are going to get rid of one of her students (who happens to be a child of another teacher and who will have no 'hope' if put into a Korean school), and another teacher was made to feel guilty over sharing their heart.

I was the next on the list, I went to share my heart about not going on the retreat and I was attacked by many words, which I don't feel I need to mention here. The whole time I kept hearing the same words come out of my mouth and the word "I" stood out very loud and clear. I kept thinking this isn't me talking, it has to be the LORD. For this isn't about me, but HIM.

The minute after I felt the urgency to send out the prayer request another teacher came up to share something about their child and what the school was trying to do. Once again I witnessed a heart being broken.

In the afternoon when I was sharing with a friend here, they had said the same thing about it being GOD who spoke the "I" and the broken hearts surrounding us. And my third confirmation was that night when talking to a friend back in the States, who isn't here to witness or see, but said the EXACT same thing about it being GOD who was speaking, about GOD's heart, and about the spiritual warfare we are under here.

To top my week off, at church on Sunday Pastor even spoke these words "the gates of hell will prevail if you stand against it alone, but it can NOT prevail against the true body of believers (the church)". He said,"When more than one are gathered together- WATCH OUT!"

This week has only gotten worse. This morning is just one example, someone shared about the tragedy at Virginia Tech by putting down Americans and blaming them for it. One person had to leave the room. I should have done that as well. I can't even describe what was going on inside of me, I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could, but at the same time wanted to stay to hear what was going to be said. Actually one teacher tried to defend Americans and Christians.

During prayer this morning GOD had me go to and read Proverbs 15 and 16. Two verses that stand out are: 15:3 The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good. And then, 16:30 He who winks with his eye is plotting perversity; he who purses his lips is bent on evil. The first is a reminder that God is watching it all and the second, well, I saw someone wink with pursed lips.........and you'll have to trust me that I can not share what it is my heart is telling me about what I saw. I just know GOD was speaking!

I know I have written so much already, and yet I haven't even begun to truly share all that is going on around me.

Right now, I am reminded again of words spoken on Sunday. Pastor stated that the first question we ask when something bad happens is WHY? However, do we ask that question when something good happens? We live in a world of Cause and Effect. He gave an example of a rock being dropped into water. It reminded me then, and again now of how true those words are to what is going on around me. He ended with saying that GOD's love is powerfully reflected in HIS body and that anytime GOD speaks we need to respond. In my notes, I added Love in Action, 1 John 3:18.

I saw love in action so often at home. I can't wait to get back and be a part of God's love being reflected again. I miss that soooo much here, besides in my classroom.

I'll end with the words I hear most often in my day, Psalm 106:1:
Praise the Lord.
Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.

Boy, those Fourth Graders have it RIGHT!